My friend that lives in Wis. has been known to purchase a case and take them home with her. When I lived in southern California, I tried to replace my love for the Allsups burrito with what the locals called a California burrito. Basically it was carne asada, fries and pico de gallo all wrapped up in a huge flour torilla –but alas, it was not my Allsups burrito. So when I drove back here for visits, I would stop at the first place (usually Fort Sumner or Melrose) I could get my hands on a burrito, even if it was 5 a.m. And during the duration of my stay I would horde those orange packets of taco sauce to pack up and take home.

Let’s not forget about the taco sauce either. It has become what I have lovingly dubbed Curry County gold. I’ve been known to steal these from my coworkers’ desks. Some people dump ranch dressing all over their food, well I douse everything in this taco sauce.

Who would have thought, a burrito and its taco sauce, would have come to be a redeeming quality for living in rural New Mexico?

Now before you start thinking that I’m going to divulge some juicy tidbit about my love life, you should probably note that I’m talking about my cell phone carrier.

Our story: My relationship with my carrier spans many years, except for a brief six month stint when I lived in west Texas. When I moved to this area I logged onto my cell phone carrier’s website and within the click of a button I was a faithful customer again. I never had any gripes about my cell phone company’s customer service. When my friends moan and complain about huge bills and hidden fees, I have a smirk on my face because that just doesn’t happen with us.

The catch: My cell phone carrier doesn’t actually have a tower in the area, so technically I’ve been roaming for over a year in Clovis. But since they don’t charge any roaming fees it’s a fee that I don’t incur.

And then my “Dear John” letter came in the mail. The gist of it was that my service was going to be terminated next month because I’m what they call an “extreme roamer.” I immediately dialed them and our conversation went like this:

Me: Hi, I got a letter in the mail explaining my account was being terminated, is this correct?

Ex: Yes, ma’am.

Me: Well, is there anything I can do? I mean, I really like you guys. Can’t I stay on?

Ex: Why, thank you. We’re glad you enjoyed our service but there is nothing we can do.

Me: So I can’t stay on?

Ex: No, ma’am I’m sorry. Periodically we review accounts, and have determined that you are an “extreme roamer.” Your roaming charges are astronomical.

Me: But, I’m a good customer and I’ve been with you guys for years.

Ex: I’m sorry ma’am. It’s not a reflection on you. It was completely a business decision. (Can you believe they gave me the -it’s not you, it’s me line?)

Me: Well, can I stay on for a little bit longer? I just don’t think a month’s notice is enough time for me to shop around.

Ex: No ma’am I’m sorry. I can’t extend you any longer.

I stopped my protests here because I’m sure the next words out of my mouth were going to be “But, I love you.”

My co-worker summed it up best for me with “I guess they just weren’t that into you.” Ouch.

But like with any other break up, I know that this is truly for the best and in the end I’ll be happier with a newer phone and a better plan.

It has come to my attention that many of you have been born with a defect that doesn’t allow you to fully process what you’re saying before it escapes your mouth.

Now, I know that the majority of you aren’t even close to being mean spirited and these slips are just a signature trademark that comes along with being a male. So I am going to help you out by giving you some real life examples of things you should never tell a female.

“You said you didn’t want anything for your >insert special occasion here< so I didn’t get you anything.”
I‘ve said this, but only because I want to give off the appearance of being nonchalant about whatever is coming up. None of us ever mean it. It doesn’t matter if you give us a candy bar or a rock that looks like our head. The important thing is that for a mere couple of seconds you weren’t preoccupied with Guitar Hero, your truck or whatever else normally fills your mind.

“You’re sister is hot.”
Never say this. Think it all you want, we know our siblings are attractive, because well duh, we share the same genes. Just never say this aloud.

“You should do your hair like Reese Witherspoon.”
This said to a brunette, with thick, curly, hair. Don’t go and pick the celebrity that we least resemble and expect us to agree that yes, our hair would look great styled in that same way. This isn’t even close to being realistic.

“Usually my parents pick on my girlfriends for being too skinny, but they didn’t say anything to you so I think they must really like you.”
I think this one’s pretty self explanatory. ‘Nuff said.

Referring to our clothing choices “What, are you gonna join the circus?”
As females most of us have some fashion sense and were born with a little fashionista inside us all. Don’t kill our feeling of being cute and trendy with a remark like that. You stick to color coordinating and matching, and that is all we will ask of you.

More importantly if you ever wonder what a female’s reaction will be –just don’t say it.

While we won first place, we didn’t win the prize for most creative name. That honor went to Clovis-Carver Public Library’s team “Lit Happens.”

So far CNJ has been proven to be unstoppable, thanks to fellow team members: Kevin Wilson, Jennette Lovett and Leslie Nagy. So the challenge is out there for next year.

Kudos go out to teams from Clovis Community College and St. James’ Church, who won second and third places.

 www.freerice.com

I like quirks because they’re the smallest, unseen but best parts of what make up an individual.

So I thought I would share some of mine:

• I think the best feeling in the world is wearing a brand new pair of socks. If I could have one indulgence it would be to wear a brand new pair of socks everyday.

• I don’t like the sunshine in the morning. I’m not a dark person by any means, quite the opposite actually. I just love the gray sky and smell of rain in the air, since it’s so rare. It’s my favorite kind of weather.

• I don’t like to drink anything other than water. Not because I’m a health nut or anything but only because I’m extremely vain when it comes to my teeth and want them to always be their whitest.

• If I like a song I usually listen to it over and over again for a few days straight. Then I tire of it and never want to hear it again. I get mad if it comes on the radio and say something completely hypocritical like “gah, they play this song all the time.”

• “Urban Cowboy” is, in my poor opinion, one of the greatest movies ever.

• If I find a book that I like then I will read every single book by that author that I can get my hands on. During that time I won’t read any other book by another author. I think it’s a commitment thing.

• I’m harboring a secret addiction to the breakfast bar. I’ve tried so many of them and always like to have a box or two of them around.

Call me weird or silly, but I prefer quirky.

Word Worm is a contest that is held by the Curry County Literacy Council. The Council works towards raising awareness and providing service for literacy needs in the community. Proceeds from this event go towards the Council.

The contest itself has five different word games such as “Scrambler” and “Weird Wordz” where teams face off against each other ultimately narrowing down to a final winning team.

Where can I sign up?
To sign up contact Nancy Clark at 769-4096 or email  curry.literacy at clovis.edu
The entry fee is $48 per team.

By when do I need to gather my team?
The deadline to register is April 1.

Who can participate?
Teams of four with a suggested alternate person, from any kind of group or organization can participate.

When is the event?
1 p.m., Saturday, April 12 at the Master’s Centre

Hope I see you there!

In my purse I am carrying:

• Receipts

• Mail

• A mis-matched wallet

• Four lip glosses (and I’m upset now because I realize I’m missing my lip plumper)

• Two AA batteries

• Two boxes of Acuvue contact lenses

• A pair of earrings

• Two USB drives

• Gum in the following flavors: Orbitz Peppermint, Stride Sweet Peppermint, Stride Sweet Cinnamon

• Two pink pens

• One purple pen

• Checkbook

• Keys

• Travel size shoe polish

• Tide to go pen

• Plastic spoon

• Keys

• Cell phone

• Various, ID, bank, gift, insurance, movie rental and business cards.

My purse/the suitcase was purchased earlier this winter when my hat, gloves and scarf weren’t able to fit in the cute little bag I was carrying around. I have found that it is comforting to carry a bag that can accomodate my “just in case” personality.

Stop cursing under my breath and feeling sorry for myself when I have to carry in all my grocery bags.

Finish my degree.

Not have an anxiety attack when my car is making funny noises or things in my house are breaking down. Like this weekend, “I don’t know what’s happening with my washer, water is just coming out,” I wailed to my parents.

Be able to look at my bank account without buyer’s remorse.

Realize that if I’m bursting with great news it’s okay if the only person I have to share it with, immediately, is my dog.

Relish in the fact that I make all of my own decisions and deal with the consequences of some of those decisions.

These are just a few, there are plenty more. Mainly, I think it’s important for me to appreciate my solo status and enjoy it. I guess at the end of the day, whether I feel like I’m barely standing, what’s important is that I’m still standing.

After hearing all about Ikea it began to take on mythical proportions. I thought, “I must go to Ikea.” So I did, a few summers ago while I was visiting San Diego.

I could hardly contain my excitement as I drove up to the mass household goods store. There was family parking, family bathrooms, a restaurant and child care center. I don’t have children, but the whole family oriented theme was still appealing. Once inside, it was better than I could have ever imagined. There were levels of numerous living, dining, kitchen and bedrooms on display with everything for sale and for cheap. You even get a map to help with navigation purposes.

“Oh my gosh there is so much stuff”
My head starts pounding.
“Wow, everything is really cheap”
My stomach starts turning.

I had to bolt for the nearest exit. It could have been that I had spent the entire day under the blazing sun at Sea World, but I prefer to think that Ikea was too much, too good and caused a sensory overload. I’ll never forget the heaviness in my heart as I drove away from Ikea, glancing wistfully over my shoulder every couple of seconds. The big, bold, yellow letters grew smaller and smaller in the rear view mirror. It was the greatest shopping experience I never got to have.